I'm Not One Of *those* Parent's, Am I?

You know, those types of parents who thinks their kid does no wrong and turns their nose up at any adult who tells them differently.

Last week Cameron had to sit out a couple times at school for pushing other children. Cameron had told me about it on her own before the teacher had. We talked to her about not hurting her friends and what would happen if she continued. The second time she told us she got in trouble she was disciplined for it just like she was told she would be. The teacher talked to me about it and I assured her that this was not something we were taking lightly or brushing off as typical 'kid behavior'. It might be typical for some, but not for Cameron. This is a child who won't even insist that a child give a toy back that they take from her, let alone get physical with them for any reason. So this report of behavior was a bit unsettling for hubby and I.

That being said, I was not totally surprised that she had behavior problems last week considering some things that had gone on in the house last week and just the overall atmosphere of the household. It stills doesn't excuse the behavior though.

We ended up getting tickets for Disney on ice that is coming this weekend. At the end of last week, over the weekend and for the past 3 days we have been telling Cameron that she needs to be good at home and at school if she wants a surprise at the end of the week. Each morning she has gotten a gentle reminder on the way to school about being nice to her friends. When I picked her up on Monday she told me she was nice and that *B* had gotten in trouble though for pushing her and one of her friends. Tuesday she reported that she didn't get in any trouble, and the same for today. As we were getting ready to leave today her teacher stoped me to tell me she was still having a problem with pushing and that it was her friends she plays with everyday that she was doing this to. Of course this came as a surprise to me considering Cameron just told me for the 3rd day in a row that she didn't get in trouble.

The teacher mentioned possible outside influence and made reference to Spongebob. She said she talked to Cameron about Spongebob not being real and not doing things that she sees him do. Now if you have ever watched an episode of Spongebob with Cameron then you know how annoying that experince can be with Cameron telling you how bad everything is that they do and say on that show. She will tell you it isn't nice for Patrick to call Spongebob stupid, or for Squidward to kick Mr. Crabs. She is well aware of right and wrong, real and pretend. We only allow her to watch Spongebob because she understands that just because Spongbob does or says it, doesn't mean she can. (I knew I shouldn't have let her wear that Spongebob shirt to school last week).

Anyway, we get out to the car and I start asking her about what happened today. She didn't know what I was talking about. I asked her if she had pushed or hit any of her friends- she said no. I asked if the teacher had to talk to her today about not behaving- she said no. I asked if she had to sit out today- again, no. Now you have to understand that Cameron always fesses up to things, even if she doesn't get caught. If she does something she knows is wrong, she will tell on herself. We have had no previous instances of her not being honest about anything. So we spent the next 30 minutes trying to break down the past three days in order to find out why the teacher would tell me in the middle of the week that she is still having an issue with pushing. She eventually broke down out of frustration and said she didn't know what she had done for the teacher to say that.

So now I am wondering what exactly is going on. Of course I am not going to call the teacher a liar, but I don't automatically dismiss what Cameron tells me either just because it is different than what an adult tells me. And this is the second time I have gotten conflicting reports about something from Cameron and the teacher.

I have asked the teacher to speak with both Cameron and I tomorrow so we can get to the bottom of things. I can not just automatically discipline her because of what the teacher says if Cameron is insistent that she has done nothing wrong. Perhaps the teacher can remind her of a specific incident from this week. I need to find out if the problem goes beyond her being physical with kids. If she is becoming dishonest as well then we need to address that as well.

I am also surprised that the teacher is quick to point to outside influences. Cameron tells me all the time about kids at school who have hit an pushed not only her but other children. She is hardly around other kids outside of school and I am just not convinced that she is picking it up from what she sees on TV.

Hopefully she can make time to talk with Cameron and I tomorrow. I am waiting to hear back from her.

2 comments:

Dawn said...

WOW! That doesn't sound like the Cam I know :-(

Not that this would excuse the behavior but she may be defending herself. Could she finally be tired of someone pushing her?

Elisabeth said...

I agree. That does not sound like the Cameron I know.

Hope you get to the bottom of this really fast!